If you desire to be successful or to make a positive impact on your world, you need to become a person influence. Without influence, there is no success. John Maxwell “Becoming A Person of Influence”
How do you master the art of influence?
Kevin DeRoo who I met through Tribe Syndication Association (TSA), will answer the how to question. Being involved with network marketing for many years, building large teams offline and online he has learned the rules of persuasion. Not only has Kevin learned the rules he knows how to communicate them. In a recent post, Leadership – Under the Influence he says, “When you learn to lead through Influence you will master the skill of leadership.” I know that when you read this guest post by Kevin you will have learned the basic fundamentals, consistent principles that you must learn and master and teach if you wish to be successful
The Art of Influence and Persuasion by Kevin DeRoo
The topics of leadership, influence, persuasion, are vast and they have been the inspiration of many books, audio programs, and seminars throughout the years. One of the earliest masterpieces in this area is a book by Dale Carnegie. Yes, you know the one, “How to Win Friends and Influence people.” Although his book was written in 1936, 75 years ago, his book still has tremendous relevance in the world today. What does this tell you? Well it's quite simple. It tells you that the ideas and strategies which are taught throughout the ages Work! The basic principles of success, leadership, influence are pretty much the same today as they were when Dale Carnegie wrote his book in the 1930's. And they will be the same in another 75 years from now. I'm not saying that we can't continue to learn and improve on these basic principles which of course we do. I'm only stating that we must acknowledge these basic principles and embrace them before we can build and shape them for our own success.
I want to start by explaining that there is a very big difference between the art of influence and persuasion and the art of Manipulation.
“Manipulation is inwardly focused on the outcome for the person doing the manipulation. Persuasion is externally focused on developing a win-win outcome where every one's needs are met.” – Dave Lakhani
As leaders we want to be masters of persuasion not Manipulation!
In order for you to master the art of persuasion you first need to know the rules. As I stated above, one could write a book about the art of persuasion, (in fact several have,) so to condense it into a short article is always tricky. That said I just want to go over a few of the rules which you must follow if you wish to persuade and influence others in a positive way for both parties involved.
Rule #1: Prepare and Plan
“The mark of the serious person, or the real professional, in any field is that he takes far more time to prepare than the average. Great successes are often determined by attention to the smallest details. One fact, one inaccuracy, can make all the difference. And everything counts.” – Brian Tracy
Isn't Brian awesome!
When you take the time to prepare and plan you will be more fluid in your thoughts and speech when explaining to others why one path is better than another. You will be in better control over the listener, and most importantly you will know precisely when to stop pushing!
Rule #2: Listen and Watch
“Want to be a strong persuader? Think Big Ears … Big Eyes … Small mouth” – Jim Randel
I don't think that I need to go into too much detail here, Jim's statement above pretty much says it all doesn't it? Most of you reading this article know all about the 80/20 (Listen 80 percent of the time, speak only 20 percent of the time.) I just wanted to mention the importance of paying attention to people’s body language as well.
Rule #3: Create a sense of reciprocity.
Another quote, have you heard this one? “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
People don't like to feel indebted. When you do something nice for someone else, they feel obligated to do something nice back for you. That's not so say that you should just go around and do everyone favours for the sole purpose of having them give something back to you. You must act with genuine sincerity which will build a relationship of mutual trust and respect between both parties.
Rule #4: Decisions are all about emotions.
If you get anything out of this article make sure that this is it! I believe the source of these next few lines are from the Network Marketing master himself, Mike Dillard.
Every single action and decision in your life
is based on attaining pleasure or avoiding pain!
The desire to avoid pain is far greater than
the desire to attain pleasure.
This is why most people give into their fears and
never do what it takes to make it big. The perceived
pain of leaving their comfort zone is greater than
the pleasure of being wealthy.
Where would your business be if you didn't run by emotion? If a no meant no different than a yes … You'd probably be a millionaire wouldn't you, because you would just keep on going until you had all the yeses that you would ever need!
Rule #5: Persuasiveness is about integrity.
Integrity and Honesty is Always the best policy
Remember these three points.
Deceit is transparent.
It takes more energy to lie than to tell the truth.
Karma: Whether you believe in it or not, you cheat people, bad things will happen to you.
As I said from the beginning persuading and influencing other is a vast topic and I have not even scratched the surface on the lessons which are to be learned and mastered on your journey towards success. What I hopefully have done is instilled that there are basic fundamental, consistent principles that you must learn and master and teach if you wish to be truly successful.
I wish to thank Perry for inviting me to his online home and letting me share with you this article on leadership, influence and persuasiveness. If you enjoyed this article then please share it with your family, Friends, and business partners by clicking on any the the “share” and “like” buttons around this article. Thanks so much.